Monthly Archives: June 2013

FOOTBALLZ OFFSEASON PREVIEWZ- THE AFC WEST

FAKE LOGOS! THE REALM OF FREELANCE DESIGNERS WHO CAN’T GET JOBS!

YO(yo) (seriously TED TALKS? Yo-yo tricks? OH BROTHER), THE AFC WEST! I used to be really into the AFC WEST (I mean doy, the Seahawks used to play in it) but as time went by my intrest waned and it just became the Broncos and a bunch of sad teams (with an occasion thought about this photo, which never gets old) AND IT SEEMS LIKE THAT MORE THAN EVER NOW. Yeesh, these teams stink and somehow (well, not somehow, it is pretty obvious how it happened) the Broncos got more annoying last season with the addition of  Peyton Manning (speaking of Bronco QBs, though I’m not into him usually, Drew Magary comes correct on this account) so we trudge along through the second to last of these. LET THE PREVIEWIZING COMMENCE!

DENVER BRONCOS

FINAL RECORD- 13-3, AFC West Champion, lost in the Divisional Round to the Baltimore Ravens

IMAGE/VIDEO STAND-IN FOR A SEASON IN REVIEW:

hahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahah

This was really delightful

OFFSEASON NEEDS:

They might have gotten a new cornerback, but they need a better rapping cornerback (though the twitter handle of @sexybologna23 is top notch).

BEST GIFT FOR YOUR LEAST FAVORITE BRONCOS FAN:

This is a great reminder of an immense fuck-up

SAN DIEGO CHARGERS

FINAL RECORD- 7-9, Second in the AFC WEST

IMAGE/VIDEO STAND-IN FOR A SEASON IN REVIEW:

this is how it went, really

this type of thing happened so much that even though this is a pretty boring photograph I feel like this is really an accurate picture of the way the season went for these guys

OFFSEASON NEEDS:

Some new people to kick around

BEST GIFT TO GIVE TO YOUR LEAST FAVORITE CHARGERS FAN:

why is this thing made?

OAKLAND RAIDERS

FINAL RECORD- 4-12, Third in the AFC WEST

IMAGE/VIDEO STAND-IN FOR A SEASON IN REVIEW:

so so alone

another boring photo, but jeez the team went 4-12 and Darren McFadden (ostensibly their best player) did a lot of this so there you go

OFFSEASON NEEDS:

a new PR guy and def not someone who acts like deceased owner Al Davis 

BEST GIFT FOR YOUR LEAST FAVORITE RAIDERS FAN:

I feel like this is good for any season, theme be damned

KANSAS CITY CHIEFS

FINAL RECORD- 2-14, Fourth in the AFC West

IMAGE/VIDEO STAND IN FOR A SEASON IN REVIEW:

SIX PLAYERS!

SOMEHOW THIS 2-14 TEAM HAD 6 PRO BOWL PLAYERS! I don’t know if this is a good sign for the Chiefs or a bad one for the Pro Bowl (oh, I know, it is for sure the latter)

OFFSEASON NEEDS:

Fewer fat jokes

BEST GIFT TO GIVE TO YOUR LEAST FAVORITE CHIEFS FAN:

Leather cuffs are the worst

next weeeeeekkkkkk thhhhheeeeee lassssssssttttttttttt previewwwwwwwwwwww

THE NFC WEST!